[frank]

Why Dogs are Better Than Men

* Dogs do not have problems expressing affection in public.

* Dogs miss you when you're gone.

* Dogs look at your eyes.

* Dogs aren't threatened by a woman with short hair.

* Dogs feel guilt when they've done something wrong.

* Dogs don't feel threatened by your intelligence.

* Dogs understand what "no" means.

* Dogs don't brag about whom they have slept with.

* Dogs do not play games with you -- except fetch and they never laugh at how you throw.

* Dogs are happy with any video you choose to rent, because they know the most important thing is that you're together.

* Dogs understand if some of their friends cannot come inside.

* Dogs think you are a culinary genius.

* Dogs are nice to your relatives.

* Dogs don't mind if you do all the driving.

* Dogs don't step on the imaginary brake.

* Dogs admit it when they're lost.

* Dogs don't weigh down your purse with their stuff.

* Dogs do not care whether you shave your legs.

* Dogs aren't threatened if you earn more than they do.

* Dogs mean it when they kiss you.

* You are never suspicious of your dog's dreams.

* You never wonder whether your dog is good enough for you.

* You can train a dog.

* You can force a dog to take a bath.

* Middle-aged dogs don't feel the need to abandon you for a younger owner.

* Gorgeous dogs don't know they're gorgeous.

* The worst social disease you can get from dogs is fleas. (OK, the really worst disease you can get from them is rabies, but there's a vaccine for it, and you get to kill the one that gave it to you.)